so i had to dump my girlfriend

[HMD]

turns out she was fucking married, and did not feel the need to let me know. and when i did find out, i was all, "aw hell no dude; fuck that!" let that be a lesson to you all: if you're going to be with an older chick, make sure she doesn't have some dude waiting for her at home.

[Hyperguy]

It could have been far worse.

[Doctor_Raven]

Well that sucks man. Sorry to hear that.

[santiO]

Note: I am about to unleash the full power of savage generalization. Bear with me.

Women usually feel an incredibly powerful urge of creating some drama in their lives. They will lie, cheat, insult, back stab and, generally, become complete man-eaters (And not the good kind, the Morrigan kind) just to feel that their lives are in danger, or something like that. They (And almost every human being, man or female) enjoy the feeling you get when you're doing something that you shouldn't be doing... and getting away with it. We all do, but women can take it to the extreme some times.

For example: at least nine times, on all stages of my life (childhood, teenage, adulthood, etc.), a friend of mine (Female, of course) unleashed an onslaught of nonsense jibba-jabba about how cold, calculating, logical and rational I am, how I never listen to my heart (For the record, I do. Right now, it's saying "Pump, pump, pump"... just like it has been saying since I was in the womb), and how that is driving her mad (Yet again, not the good kind of mad) and that she doesn't want to be my friend no more. My typical response would be "Ok. You're free to do what you want, and I'm no one to stop you. Of course, I'm kinda sad, but I believe that I must have something that you find really annoying if you want to leave me. So it's my fault, and I would try to fix it, but you already said that you don't want to be my friend no more, so you're eliminating any chance of me fixing it. So, au revoir, have a happy life". Now, this would leave the girl/woman in question with a confused look on her face before turning around and walking away.

On all nine times, I waited a few hours, or days, and the girl/woman suddenly returned, giving me something like "Oh, sorry, I don't know what came over me, please please please PUH-LEEZ forgive me!". My response? "Oh, OK, I forgive you. But, you see, as I told you, I have the fault for all of this, so I will try from now on to be a better friend. And thanks for giving me a second chance. You truly are a wonderful person!". And then, on 8 of the 9 times, the girl gave me another confused look, then an angry look, and finally yelled something to the effects of "How can you be so fucking calm?" before laughing. And then everything would return to normal.

I believe that these girls/women must've been playing some sort of mildly-twisted game with the only goal of turning her life (And mine's) into some kind of soap-opera. After a few years of analysis, I think I've found what they wanted me to say.

In the first stage, the break-up, I should have kneeled and crawled and go all "Ohh, please, please, don't leave me! I'll do anything you want!", so that she could play drama-queen and, with tears in her eyes, say "I'm sorry, but I can't take it anymore. I must leave you!" before turning around and running away.

In the second stage, the return, I should have played hard to get, crossed my arms and said "No, now I don't want you. You insulted me, and now come to me asking for my forgiveness? Forget about it!" so that she could play regretful maiden and go all "I'm so sorry! Please, don't leave me! I'll do anything!" and, Voila! The tables are turned!

As you can notice, me being me, I turned their whole game upside down thanks to the marvelous, wonderful, and incredibly under rated power of Logic, Reason and Common Sense, leading to the girl/woman's final comment on me being calm.

I'm not going to say that this proves my theory, but it's more of an example of a pattern. Of course, once again, I'm being extremely general with this. There are many, and I mean MANY women who live their whole lives without doing any of this, and their are the worthy ones.

It's like those girls who hook up with complete idiots, with assholes with no brain and no balls and no nothing, suckers who punch them to feel better about themselves, all for what? To piss off their father or mother, to make them go "I don't want to see you with that boy ever again!".

So, my final piece of advice: watch out for the thrill-seekers. If you hook up with one, there's a good chance you'll end up punched in the face by angry boyfriends/husbands, and then you'll have her entering your house through your window and going all "I know we shouldn't be seeing each other, but...".

And now, give me some time to get my shield and prepare for the charge of the "Go back to the 1950s, you Johnny Bravo reject!" responses from angry feminists.

[Hyperguy]

I'd like to see an angry femminist post here, but only because I'm a mildly twisted woman in need of more drama on the forum.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

lol

[Doctor_Raven]

See the Logic angle can only work so long as Instinct is kept in his cage.  If she did this naked, you might fall for the trap!

Still if they wanted DRAMA, and Soap Opera Drama, I say go the right old route of "bomb in the lasagna' routine. That or pull out a manga/comic/script and do the routine she wanted in a deadpan tone.

[ragnabot]

Sorry to hear that.

Note: I am about to unleash the full power of savage generalization. Bear with me.

Women usually feel an incredibly powerful urge of creating some drama in their lives. They will lie, cheat, insult, back stab and, generally, become complete man-eaters (And not the good kind, the Morrigan kind) just to feel that their lives are in danger, or something like that. They (And almost every human being, man or female) enjoy the feeling you get when you're doing something that you shouldn't be doing... and getting away with it. We all do, but women can take it to the extreme some times.

For example: at least nine times, on all stages of my life (childhood, teenage, adulthood, etc.), a friend of mine (Female, of course) unleashed an onslaught of nonsense jibba-jabba about how cold, calculating, logical and rational I am, how I never listen to my heart (For the record, I do. Right now, it's saying "Pump, pump, pump"... just like it has been saying since I was in the womb), and how that is driving her mad (Yet again, not the good kind of mad) and that she doesn't want to be my friend no more. My typical response would be "Ok. You're free to do what you want, and I'm no one to stop you. Of course, I'm kinda sad, but I believe that I must have something that you find really annoying if you want to leave me. So it's my fault, and I would try to fix it, but you already said that you don't want to be my friend no more, so you're eliminating any chance of me fixing it. So, au revoir, have a happy life". Now, this would leave the girl/woman in question with a confused look on her face before turning around and walking away.

On all nine times, I waited a few hours, or days, and the girl/woman suddenly returned, giving me something like "Oh, sorry, I don't know what came over me, please please please PUH-LEEZ forgive me!". My response? "Oh, OK, I forgive you. But, you see, as I told you, I have the fault for all of this, so I will try from now on to be a better friend. And thanks for giving me a second chance. You truly are a wonderful person!". And then, on 8 of the 9 times, the girl gave me another confused look, then an angry look, and finally yelled something to the effects of "How can you be so fucking calm?" before laughing. And then everything would return to normal.

I believe that these girls/women must've been playing some sort of mildly-twisted game with the only goal of turning her life (And mine's) into some kind of soap-opera. After a few years of analysis, I think I've found what they wanted me to say.

In the first stage, the break-up, I should have kneeled and crawled and go all "Ohh, please, please, don't leave me! I'll do anything you want!", so that she could play drama-queen and, with tears in her eyes, say "I'm sorry, but I can't take it anymore. I must leave you!" before turning around and running away.

In the second stage, the return, I should have played hard to get, crossed my arms and said "No, now I don't want you. You insulted me, and now come to me asking for my forgiveness? Forget about it!" so that she could play regretful maiden and go all "I'm so sorry! Please, don't leave me! I'll do anything!" and, Voila! The tables are turned!

As you can notice, me being me, I turned their whole game upside down thanks to the marvelous, wonderful, and incredibly under rated power of Logic, Reason and Common Sense, leading to the girl/woman's final comment on me being calm.

I'm not going to say that this proves my theory, but it's more of an example of a pattern. Of course, once again, I'm being extremely general with this. There are many, and I mean MANY women who live their whole lives without doing any of this, and their are the worthy ones.

It's like those girls who hook up with complete idiots, with assholes with no brain and no balls and no nothing, suckers who punch them to feel better about themselves, all for what? To piss off their father or mother, to make them go "I don't want to see you with that boy ever again!".

So, my final piece of advice: watch out for the thrill-seekers. If you hook up with one, there's a good chance you'll end up punched in the face by angry boyfriends/husbands, and then you'll have her entering your house through your window and going all "I know we shouldn't be seeing each other, but...".

And now, give me some time to get my shield and prepare for the charge of the "Go back to the 1950s, you Johnny Bravo reject!" responses from angry feminists.

This is a good read. Need to save for future generations!

[bfg00]

Note: I am about to unleash the full power of savage generalization. Bear with me.

Women usually feel an incredibly powerful urge of creating some drama in their lives. They will lie, cheat, insult, back stab and, generally, become complete man-eaters (And not the good kind, the Morrigan kind) just to feel that their lives are in danger, or something like that. They (And almost every human being, man or female) enjoy the feeling you get when you're doing something that you shouldn't be doing... and getting away with it. We all do, but women can take it to the extreme some times.

For example: at least nine times, on all stages of my life (childhood, teenage, adulthood, etc.), a friend of mine (Female, of course) unleashed an onslaught of nonsense jibba-jabba about how cold, calculating, logical and rational I am, how I never listen to my heart (For the record, I do. Right now, it's saying "Pump, pump, pump"... just like it has been saying since I was in the womb), and how that is driving her mad (Yet again, not the good kind of mad) and that she doesn't want to be my friend no more. My typical response would be "Ok. You're free to do what you want, and I'm no one to stop you. Of course, I'm kinda sad, but I believe that I must have something that you find really annoying if you want to leave me. So it's my fault, and I would try to fix it, but you already said that you don't want to be my friend no more, so you're eliminating any chance of me fixing it. So, au revoir, have a happy life". Now, this would leave the girl/woman in question with a confused look on her face before turning around and walking away.

On all nine times, I waited a few hours, or days, and the girl/woman suddenly returned, giving me something like "Oh, sorry, I don't know what came over me, please please please PUH-LEEZ forgive me!". My response? "Oh, OK, I forgive you. But, you see, as I told you, I have the fault for all of this, so I will try from now on to be a better friend. And thanks for giving me a second chance. You truly are a wonderful person!". And then, on 8 of the 9 times, the girl gave me another confused look, then an angry look, and finally yelled something to the effects of "How can you be so fucking calm?" before laughing. And then everything would return to normal.

I believe that these girls/women must've been playing some sort of mildly-twisted game with the only goal of turning her life (And mine's) into some kind of soap-opera. After a few years of analysis, I think I've found what they wanted me to say.

In the first stage, the break-up, I should have kneeled and crawled and go all "Ohh, please, please, don't leave me! I'll do anything you want!", so that she could play drama-queen and, with tears in her eyes, say "I'm sorry, but I can't take it anymore. I must leave you!" before turning around and running away.

In the second stage, the return, I should have played hard to get, crossed my arms and said "No, now I don't want you. You insulted me, and now come to me asking for my forgiveness? Forget about it!" so that she could play regretful maiden and go all "I'm so sorry! Please, don't leave me! I'll do anything!" and, Voila! The tables are turned!

As you can notice, me being me, I turned their whole game upside down thanks to the marvelous, wonderful, and incredibly under rated power of Logic, Reason and Common Sense, leading to the girl/woman's final comment on me being calm.

I'm not going to say that this proves my theory, but it's more of an example of a pattern. Of course, once again, I'm being extremely general with this. There are many, and I mean MANY women who live their whole lives without doing any of this, and their are the worthy ones.

It's like those girls who hook up with complete idiots, with assholes with no brain and no balls and no nothing, suckers who punch them to feel better about themselves, all for what? To piss off their father or mother, to make them go "I don't want to see you with that boy ever again!".

So, my final piece of advice: watch out for the thrill-seekers. If you hook up with one, there's a good chance you'll end up punched in the face by angry boyfriends/husbands, and then you'll have her entering your house through your window and going all "I know we shouldn't be seeing each other, but...".

And now, give me some time to get my shield and prepare for the charge of the "Go back to the 1950s, you Johnny Bravo reject!" responses from angry feminists.

I will agree with most of this.  It definitely explains alot about the current "Reality TV" craze.

[Cashino]

It definitely explains alot about the current "Reality TV" craze.

Indeed.

This stereotype is what I classify as a bimbo (wikipedia explains that a bimbo is a backronym for "body impressive, brain optional" for some reason, but I ain't complaining).

Traits of a bimbo: overly done make-up and clothing, little to zero logic skills, almost as bad intelligence, selfish (call them selfish, they'll hate you for it, I know from experiance), narcissistic with humility of zilp, spends all her time watching soap operas or talking to her friends (cell phone or otherwise),  spends all her time attempting to enhance social status, extreme materialism, sometimes megalomaniacal (becoming an actress or pop singer), frequent delusions (of stupidity)

Yeah, in other words, no redeeming qualities other than perhaps looks and use for influence over other people.

Side note: I'm curious as why the hell are most women so addicted to soap operas. I've seen real operas that have more substance than soap operas and reality TV in general.

[MMX]

lol

[YunaChou]

I am so sorry to hear that .____.
My heart goes out to you

[HMD]

lol

that was actually my reaction to the whole thing. one would expect me to be all sad and crying and shit. nope. it was like, "wait, you're MARRIED!?" "yeah" "haha really?" "yeah" "hahaha" "do you still want to be with me?" "haha no we're done" pretty much me laughing at her the whole time. if i'm lucky, i got another girl to get with by the end of the week, so it's no big loss.

[Cashino]

if i'm lucky, i got another girl to get with by the end of the week, so it's no big loss.

That's how it should be. Just bounce right back.

[YunaChou]

Thats not necessarily a good thing to just jump into another relationship
I know its such a dude thing to do...but its sometimes not the best option =/
If you really cared for this woman, then you need the appropiate time to moran over her.
As lame as that sounds its really for the best. That way she is completely out of your system and you wont carry your upset feelings into the next realtionship

[tsar]

I highly disagree with that, considering one of my former girlfriends went through a total of three guys in less than a few weeks. It's not a "dude" thing.

[Cashino]

Thats not necessarily a good thing to just jump into another relationship
I know its such a dude thing to do...but its sometimes not the best option =/
If you really cared for this woman, then you need the appropiate time to moran over her.
As lame as that sounds its really for the best. That way she is completely out of your system and you wont carry your upset feelings into the next realtionship

In this case, however, there's nothing to really lament. She was a wife that was cheating on her husband. In actuality, it's a good thing HMD found out, cause then there's a lot of shit to be had if the husband found out first and stuff like that. I mean, if the husband if one of those loose cannon types...well, I think you can figure the rest out.

[Kiinan Yamasu]

Thats not necessarily a good thing to just jump into another relationship
I know its such a dude thing to do...but its sometimes not the best option =/
If you really cared for this woman, then you need the appropiate time to moran over her.
As lame as that sounds its really for the best. That way she is completely out of your system and you wont carry your upset feelings into the next realtionship

Oh yeah, mourn over a fuckin' whore that was cheatin' on her husband with you, yeah, that's brilliant. =\

[Ellendesu]

Oh yeah, mourn over a fuckin' whore that was cheatin' on her husband with you, yeah, that's brilliant. =\

OH SHIT SON

[YunaChou]

You guys are misunderstanding me

Yes, it was horrible for her to have done what she did and there are other grisl like that.
However, if you ended up having strong feelings for her or maybe you were in love with her, you have emotional turmoil.
What tends to happen with lots of men ( not every single one) is they wish to fill their pain up with something else as fast as possible, which tends to be another woman.
I am only saying that you should take the time to "get over her" (whatever that means to you) before you try getting yourself involvled with another girl. I have seen many a dude fuck up his next relationship because he never really got over his old girlfriend.

She was a bitch for what she was doing yes, however, you cant help but perhaps have strong feelings for who you thought she was. It is a very good thing you discovered her true intentions and made the decisons you thought were best. I am just giving a peace of friendly adivice so you could perhaps have a clearer head when trying to persue another relationship

[MMX]

Don't you guys know, all the scummiest shit is a dude thing.  'Cuz that's what dudes do.

PS. I molest children.

PPS.  I still molest children.